Betty Crocker with a smirk

Li’l Smokey Cheese Ball
"I Like You" by Amy Sedaris

INGREDIENTS

• 2 cups of shredded smoked Gouda cheese
• 16 ounces of cream cheese
• 1/2 cup of butter
• 2 1/2 tablespoons of milk
• 2 1/2 teaspoons of Steak Sauce
• 1 cupped of chopped nuts

DIRECTIONS

Bring all ingredients to room temp. Add milk and steak sauce and beat until completely blended. Chill over night. Turn it into a ball the next morning. Roll it in the nut mixture. Serve it room temp, spread on a Ritz cracker.


Iced Citrus Tea
"I Like You" by Amy Sedaris

INGREDIENTS

• 1 quart water
• 8 tea bags
• 1 6-ounce can limeade, frozen concentrate
• 1 6-ounce can lemonade, frozen concentrate
• 1 6-ounce can orange juice, frozen concentrate
• 1 cup sugar

DIRECTIONS

Boil water, add tea bags and allow to steep.

Add these ingredients to a one-gallon jar. Fill to top with ice-cold water and mix well. Add to pitcher before service and garnish with lemon, lime, and orange rings.

courtesy of Amy Sedaris.

Halloween Party

Gameplan
2 Days Before Party:

* Coat muffin cups with chocolate for Peanut Butter cups and refrigerate.

* Boil vegetables in salted water for Poached Garlic Soup until soft

* Puree for smoothness, cover and refrigerate

* Freeze hand and face ice cubes for Vampire Punch

1 Day Before Party:

* Prepare peanut butter mixture for hardened cups

* Add banana chip on each cup, refrigerate for hardening

* Cut graham crackers into Halloween shapes for S’mores

Morning of Party:

* Blend sweets for the Slimedoo Fondue until melted

* Mix in green food coloring, place in fondue pot for serving

* Re-heat soup, mix in cream, and serve in warm bowls

15 minutes Before Party:

* Mix juices for Vampire Blood Punch, put in body ice cubes and serve


Build Me Up, Peanut Butter Cup

12 paper muffin cups
1 (9.7 ounce) bar bittersweet chocolate, chopped (recommended: Scharfenberger)
1 cup your favorite peanut butter
1/2 cup powdered sugar
Pinch grey salt
12 to 15 dried banana chips

Cut the top half off of the muffin cups so that they are shallower.

Reserve 1/4 cup of the chopped chocolate. Pour the rest into a glass bowl and melt them in the microwave: Microwave at 50 percent power for 1 minute. Stir the chips gently, and let them sit for a minute or so. If the chocolate needs more melting, microwave those chippies again at half power for 30 seconds. Stir gently. Continue the process, stirring gently as you go. But be very careful not to overcook the chocolate.

Temper the melted chocolate by stirring in the reserved 1/4 cup of chopped chocolate chips as it cools. This will 're-emulsify' the chocolate and enable it to harden at room temperature.

Using a teaspoon, spoon a portion of the chocolate into the middle of a muffin cup. Draw the chocolate up the edges of the cup with the back of the spoon (or you can paint the chocolate on with a small paintbrush). Coat the entire inside of the muffin cup with chocolate and place it into a muffin tin. Repeat with the remaining muffin cups and then put the whole muffin tin in the refrigerator so that the chocolate hardens.

Combine the peanut butter, powdered sugar, and salt in a mixer. Pour the mixture into a resealable plastic bag and seal.

When the chocolate in the muffin cups has hardened, pop the sweetened peanut butter into the microwave on full power for 1 minute. This will soften up the peanut butter so that it easily flows into the cups.
Cut a corner off the edge of the plastic bag. You can use this to pipe the peanut butter into each of the chocolate-coated cups. Put a banana chip on top of each cup. Put the candy in the refrigerator to harden the peanut butter. This should take 15 to 20 minutes.


S 'Mores at the Door

1 box graham crackers
1 bag marshmallows
4 bars good quality milk chocolate (recommended: Scharffen Berger)
Halloween cookie cutters

Lay the graham crackers in a single layer on a microwave-safe plate. Heat them in the microwave for 30 seconds to 1 minute on high.

Using a metal cookie cutter, cut the graham crackers into a Halloween shape (pumpkins, bats, cats, and eyeballs without too many little details work best).

Light a hibachi on a table near your door. Make sure there is fireproof stone underneath to prevent melting things. Next to the hibachi, put some wooden skewers. Set out a tray of the marshmallows, graham cracker shapes and chocolate near the hibachi.

Encourage trick or treaters to make their own s'mores at the door!



Green Chocolate Slimedoo

2 cups heavy cream
2 ounces sugar
2 ounces butter
2 pounds white chocolate
6 to 12 drops green food coloring
2 bags pretzels
Strawberries, bananas, pineapples, apples for dipping
Candy corn and Halloween shaped sprinkles

Make a ganache. In a non-reactive double boiler set over medium-low heat, bring the cream, sugar, and butter to a boil. Meanwhile, chop the chocolate into small chunks - a serrated knife works best for this.

Add the chocolate chunks to the cream mixture in the double boiler, whisking, until it is melted and incorporated into the cream. Finally, add the food coloring until it is the desired shade of green.

Keep mixture warm in a fondue pot near the door. Set out the fruit and the pretzels for dipping with long wooden skewers next to the fondue pot. Guests can dip their pretzels or fruit into the fondue and then roll them in the candy sprinkles, if desired.


Poached Garlic Soup

2 cups garlic cloves
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 cup diced onion (1/4-inch dice)
1 cup finely chopped leek, white part only
1/2 cup diced celery (1/4-inch dice)
1 bay leaf
1 tablespoon grey salt
1 cup diced, peeled, russet potatoes
Freshly ground pepper
4 to 5 cups chicken stock or canned low salt chicken broth
1 tablespoon coarsely chopped fresh oregano leaves
4 cups roughly chopped spinach leaves
1 cup heavy cream

Peel the garlic cloves, cut in half lengthwise, and remove the central greenish core. Put in a small pan of salted water and bring to a boil. Drain and repeat twice to remove the garlic's heat and leave only the sweetness behind.

Heat the olive oil in a large, heavy pot over medium heat until hot. Add the onion, leek, celery, bay leaf, and a little salt to draw the water out of the onion. Cover and cook until the vegetables are soft but not brown, about 10 minutes. Add the potatoes. Add the blanched garlic and stock. Season with salt and pepper, to taste. Bring to a boil over high heat, reduce the heat to a simmer, cover and cook until the vegetables are very tender, about 15 minutes.

Remove soup from the heat and cool to room temperature. Place cooled pot with soup in refrigerator to chill. Day of party re-heat soup over medium heat. Add the oregano, spinach, and cream and cook 1 minute to wilt the spinach. Transfer to blender and carefully blend until smooth *see note below.

*When blending hot liquids: Remove liquid from the heat and allow to cool for at least 5 minutes. Transfer liquid to a blender or food processor and fill it no more than halfway. If using a blender, release one corner of the lid. This prevents the vacuum effect that creates heat explosions. Place a towel over the top of the machine, pulse a few times then process on high speed until smooth.


Vampire Blood Drink

1 gallon cranberry juice
1 gallon orange juice
1 cup raspberry sorbet
1 quart seltzer
Body Part Ice Cubes, recipe follows

Mix the juices together. Add the sorbet, softened, and stir until it disappears. Add the seltzer.

Before serving, chill with the Body Part Cubes of floating face and hands.

Pour into glasses and stir with glow stick swizzle sticks.

Body Part Ice Cubes:
12 cups cold water
2 to 3 drops green food coloring

Special Equipment:
1 roll packing tape
1 roll plastic wrap
2 plastic gloves
1 plastic Halloween face mask

Color the cold water with enough green food coloring to make it stand out against the background of the punch.

Use packing tape to seal of the eyes, nose and mouth openings of the mask. Line the inside of mask with plastic wrap to prevent leaking. Place it in a bowl that will hold the mask as still as possible while freezing. Fill with the colored water up to the line of the mask, making sure not to spill over if possible. Place bowl in freezer to solidify, at least 24 hours.

Fill 2 food service gloves with colored water and twist and knot opening closed to make a tight seal. Freeze gloves for 12 to 24 hours.

When frozen, cut plastic gloves off. Take ice out of mask, putting hot water on the outside of the mask, if necessary, to help it come out easily.

Carefully float the face and hands in the punch.

courtesy of Micheal Chiarello

Lime Time!

Limon Chicken

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts halves
Salt and pepper
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon minced garlic
2 pounds yellow onions, halved and sliced
3 tablespoons yellow Peruvian chile or aji amarillo paste (or diced green chiles)
1 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice, about 5 to 6 lemons

Season both sides of the chicken liberally with salt and pepper. Heat the oil in a deep saucepan, add the chicken and sear on both sides until golden brown, about 2 minutes on each side. Remove the chicken and add the onions and garlic and cook at medium-low heat until the onions are golden brown, about 10 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, stir in the yellow chile and return the chicken to the pan. Spoon some of the onions over the chicken, cover and cook for 10 to 15 minutes, until chile sauce has completely infused the mixture and the chicken is cooked through. Add the lemon juice and cook another 10 minutes, to allow flavors to meld.



Mango, Jicama and Radish Salad with Peanut Dressing

3 tablespoons smooth peanut butter
1/4 cup fresh lime juice (about 2 limes)
2 tablespoons light brown sugar
2 tablespoons canola or vegetable oil
Salt
8 large radishes, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced crosswise
6 cups mixed baby greens, washed and dried
1 large or 2 small mangoes, peeled, fruit cut off the seed and cubed
2 cups peeled and cubed jicama (cut into about 1/2-inch cubes)
1/4 cup fresh cilantro leaves

In a medium bowl, whisk the peanut butter and lime juice until smooth. Add the brown sugar, vegetable oil and some salt and whisk until combined. Add enough water to thin the sauce and give it a dressing-like consistency, about 2 to 3 tablespoons.
Place the radishes, greens, mangoes, jicama and cilantro in a large bowl and toss together. Drizzle with the dressing, toss using tongs to coat and serve.



Snowball Potatoes

4 medium russet potatoes, peeled
1 tablespoon salt
2 ounces Oaxaca or any other soft white cheese, cubed
1 cup seasoned bread crumbs
Salt and pepper

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

Put potatoes in a large pot and fill with water until potatoes are just covered. Add the 1 tablespoon salt. Bring to a boil and cook until potatoes are very soft, about 40 minutes.

Press potatoes through a potato ricer or pulse in a bowl with an immersion hand blender until they are mashed. Let sit for a few minutes until just cool enough to handle.

Cut the white cheese in 1/2-inch cubes.

Prepare a baking sheet with foil wrap and coat with vegetable spray or rub with oil.

Put bread crumbs in a small bowl.

While mashed potatoes are still warm, form into 2-inch balls and insert 1 cheese cube in center, then roll into bread crumbs and place on cookie sheet. Wash hands and dry after every third ball so the potatoes will form evenly and not stick to the bread crumbs in your hand. Quantity should make about 10 balls.

Bake for 20 to 25 minutes, serve immediately.




Watermelon Lime Spritzer

2 cups seedless watermelon, cut into cubes
1/2 cup ice cubes
2 cups lemon-lime flavored soda, divided
1 lime, cut into wedges

Place the watermelon and ice cubes in a blender and blend until liquefied. (Once you add the lemon-lime soda, it will thin out even more, add more ice cubes if you want it slushier.) Slowly add 1/2 of the lemon-lime soda and blend until smooth. Pour into glasses, garnish with limes and serve.

Courtesy of Ingrid Hoffman.

Pizza Party

Roman Pizza

2 (8-ounce) pieces of purchased or homemade pizza dough, recipe follows
1/3 cup homemade or purchased marinara sauce
1/3 cup (lightly packed) shredded smoked mozzarella cheese
1 cup (lightly packed) shredded Fontina cheese
2 ounces mushrooms, thinly sliced
2 ounces pancetta, chopped

Position 1 oven rack in the center and the second rack on the bottom of the oven and preheat to 450 degrees F.

Roll out each piece of pizza dough into a 13 1/2 by 8 1/2-inch rectangle. Transfer to separate large baking sheets.

Spoon the marinara sauce over the pizzas, dividing equally and leaving a 1-inch border around each pizza. Sprinkle the mozzarella and Fontina cheeses over the pizzas, dividing equally. Sprinkle the mushrooms and pancetta over the cheese. Bake the pizzas until the crusts are crisp and brown on the bottom and the cheese is melted on top, about 15 minutes. Cut the pizzas crosswise into rectangular slices and serve immediately.

Pizza Dough:
1/2 cup warm water (105 to 110 degrees F)
2 teaspoons active dry yeast
2 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for kneading
1 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons olive oil, plus more for bowl

Mix the warm water and yeast in a small bowl to blend. Let stand until the yeast dissolves, about 5 minutes. Mix the flour and salt in a food processor to blend. Blend in the oil. With the machine running, add the yeast mixture and blend just until the dough forms. Turn the dough out onto lightly floured surface and knead until smooth, about 1 minute. Transfer the dough to a large oiled bowl and turn the dough to coat with the oil. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and set aside in a warm draft-free area until the dough doubles in volume, about 1 hour. Punch the down dough and form into ball. The dough can be used immediately or stored airtight in the refrigerator for 1 day.




Mini Shrimp Calzones

2 tablespoons olive oil
1 clove garlic, minced
1 cup canned chopped tomatoes in juice
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
2 tablespoons chopped fresh Italian parsley leaves
1/2 cup dry white wine
1 pound uncooked large shrimp, peeled and deveined
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
6 (4-ounce) pieces of purchased or homemade pizza dough, recipe follows
3 cups shredded mozzarella
1 large egg, beaten to blend (for egg wash)
Extra-virgin olive oil
Heat the oil in a heavy large skillet over medium-low heat. Add the garlic and saute until fragrant and tender, about 2 minutes. Add the tomatoes, thyme, parsley, and wine. Increase the heat to medium and simmer until most of the liquid evaporates, about 8 minutes. In a small bowl, season the shrimp with salt and pepper. Add the shrimp to the skillet and saute until just cooked through, about 2 minutes. Set aside to cool in a small bowl.

Position 1 oven rack in the center and the second rack on the bottom of the oven and preheat to 450 degrees F.

Line 2 heavy large baking sheets with parchment paper. Roll out each piece of pizza dough into a 7-inch-diameter floured round. Sprinkle half of the mozzarella over the lower half of each pizza dough, dividing equally and leaving a 1-inch border. Spoon the shrimp mixture over the cheese. Sprinkle the remaining cheese over the shrimp mixture. Brush the edge of the dough with egg wash. Fold the plain dough halves over the filling, forming half circles. Pinch the edges of dough firmly together and crimp to seal.

Transfer the calzones to the 2 prepared sheets. Bake until the calzones puff and become golden brown, about 12 to 15 minutes. Brush extra-virgin olive oil over calzones and serve.
Pizza Dough:
1/2 cup warm water (105 to 110 degrees F)
2 teaspoons active dry yeast
2 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for kneading
1 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons olive oil, plus more for bowl

Mix the warm water and yeast in a small bowl to blend. Let stand until the yeast dissolves, about 5 minutes. Mix the flour and salt in a food processor to blend. Blend in the oil. With the machine running, add the yeast mixture and blend just until the dough forms. Turn the dough out onto lightly floured surface and knead until smooth, about 1 minute. Transfer the dough to a large oiled bowl and turn the dough to coat with the oil. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and set aside in a warm draft-free area until the dough doubles in volume, about 1 hour. Punch the down dough and form into ball. The dough can be used immediately or stored airtight in the refrigerator for 1 day.



Chocolate Pizza

1 pound homemade pizza dough, recipe follows, or purchased pizza dough
2 teaspoons butter, melted
1/4 cup chocolate-hazelnut spread (recommended: Nutella)
1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
2 tablespoons milk chocolate chips
2 tablespoons white chocolate chips
2 tablespoons chopped hazelnuts, toasted
Position the oven rack on the bottom of the oven and preheat to 450 degrees F.

Line a heavy large baking sheet with parchment paper. Roll out the dough to a 9-inch-diameter round. Transfer the dough to the prepared baking sheet. Using your fingers, make indentations all over the dough. Brush the dough with butter, then bake until the crust is crisp and pale golden brown, about 20 minutes. Immediately spread the chocolate-hazelnut spread over the pizza then sprinkle all the chocolate chips over. Bake just until the chocolate begins to melt, about 1 minute. Sprinkle the hazelnuts over the pizza. Cut into wedges and serve.
Pizza Dough:
1/2 cup warm water (105 to 110 degrees F)
2 teaspoons active dry yeast
2 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for kneading
1 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons olive oil, plus more for bowl

Mix the warm water and yeast in a small bowl to blend. Let stand until the yeast dissolves, about 5 minutes. Mix the flour and salt in a food processor to blend. Blend in the oil. With the machine running, add the yeast mixture and blend just until the dough forms. Turn the dough out onto lightly floured surface and knead until smooth, about 1 minute. Transfer the dough to a large oiled bowl and turn the dough to coat with the oil. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and set aside in a warm draft-free area until the dough doubles in volume, about 1 hour. Punch the down dough and form into ball. The dough can be used immediately or stored airtight in the refrigerator for 1 day.

courtesy of Giada De Laurentiis

T.G.I.F.

Captain Stack's Fried Flounder

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp pepper

1/3 cup of cornmeal or breadcrumbs

4 pieces of flounder filet

Vegetable Oil

Leave filets wet. Dredge fish in salt, pepper,

and cornmeal or breadcrumbs. deep fry in oil at

375 degrees F until golden brown.

Captain's Mouthwatering Bite-Size Blue Ball Cheese Balls

1 cup of grated Cheddar cheese

4 oz of cream cheese

2 oz of crumbled blue cheese

2 Tbs of butter

1 Tbs of chopped green onions (optional)

1/2 tsp of Worcestershire sauce

1 Tbs of white wine

1/4 cup of chopped walnuts

crackers

Bring all cheeses to room temp. beat with mixer.

Add butter, onions (optional), Worcestershire sauce, and

wine, and continue beating, Chill overnight. Shape

mixture into tumor sized balls. Roll in chopped nuts. Let

stand 15 minutes. Spread on crackers.

Skipper's Dock Romaine Salad

3 heads of romaine lettuce chopped (cold)

croutons

6 tbs of garlic oil

salt and pepper

1 Tbs of Worcestershire sauce

1/4 cup of olive oil

3/4 cup of vegetable oil

6 Tbs of grated romano cheese

1 egg

Juice of 3 lemons

Arrange the lettuce, croutons, garlic oil, salt

and pepper, Worcestershire sauce, olive oil, vegetable

oil, and cheese in a bowl. Break egg over the salad and

pour lemon juice on top of the egg. Toss salad from the bottom.

Compliments of Amy Sedaris.